Religion
Briefing Shachonian religion has always been pretty weird. Here, we are going to talk about a history of Shachonian religion, starting at the tribal stage. Tribal Religion When Shachonian religion began it was pretty wonky. All the Shachonians worshiped a god called Shi'co(sh-I-ko). To worship him, once a year the Shachonians would sit on spice gysers and be blasted into the sky, hoping to meet Shi'co. But they never did. So they gave up on religion and began talking about science, which was even crazier the religion. After the USS Time Hopper was destroyed, they began beliving someone was responsible for saving them, so they began beliving in in a god called Sjako(sha-ko). Soon, someone said there must be a god resonsible for saving them(Sjako), a god responsible for creating spice(Shi'co), a god responsible for e.c.t. Next thing you know, the Shachonians begin worshiping a 100 gods. Can life get any more complicated? Early Civilization Religion Early civilization religion wasn't as crazy as tribal religion , but they did belive there was a great being(almost like a god, but instead they call the god dog, resulting that when they visited Earth, they began bowing whenever a dog walked by), and the being's(a.k.a, a dog) name was Sajo(sa-ho). Near the end of the Early Civilization stage, two civil war began, ending the era of religion, for a long time. The Holy Shachonian War The war began when a non-religious scientist called Issac Von Tsitniecs(tets-nI-x-ces) began rebeling against the religious people, leading to his execution. Scientist belived that this was an insult to science, so they formed a gang and murdered King Ohcahs(o-kas). This meant war. A year after the war began, Sir Proton Shoogo, leader of the SMG(Scientific Mafia Gang) was turned into mincmeat by Reli(the blender)Ogoo. People thought he was an assasin sent by the Ye Old Blender Company, leading to the company's demise. Reli Ogoo was actually sent by the Holy Militia(aka the Religious Militia), lead San Reli, Reli Ogoo's brother born one second before Reli Ogoo was. Meaning that San Reli has his birthday one second before Reli Ogoo does. Anyway, detective Semaj Dnob(see-maj/nob) was sent to the case to find Reli Ogoo because no one saw him at the Ye Old Blender Company castlequarters(yes, this is that long ago!). Semaj Dnob then traced Reli's footprints to the Holy Militia castlequarters. He invaded it, and ended up killing Reli Ogoo with his own blender. He then battled San Reli, and short story, he lost. Realising that the Holy Militia was responsible for Sir Proton Shoogo's death, the war started all over again. Even though the war ended only a week ago. The Holy Shachonian War II Battles once again raged when the SMG and Holy Militia clashed. The first batle took place inside a Shachonian village. Many houses were destroyed, and the entire village was evaquated. The Holy Militia won the battle, but the SMG escaped. The next battle took place in the vast desert of the canyon they lived in. It ways alot like the truck chase from Indiana Jones: Raiders of the lost Ark, except there was no Ark, and the trucks were replaced by Shagoo(aquatic horses with a fish head and floating limbs, like all life on planet Aquarius) pulling wagons. The Holy Militia once again won the battle, and the SMG escaped into the old sewers(which smelled!). They then had a final battle at Mt. Aqua, in which San Reli triped and fell into the volcano, and was roasted alive. But then Genral Hagon of the SMG turned out to be a traitor and replaced San Reli as the Holy Militia leader. He led his armies anywhere, no matter how dangerous the place was. The only thing he wanted to do was to destroy the SMG, and end the rain of science. Though he never did. The SMG knew that the Holy Militia would follow them anywhere, so they led them into the Von Caligan Canyon. A deep canyon that leads directly to the planet's core. So Genral Hagon and the Holy Militia marched bravely to the canyon, and cowerdly felll to their deaths. Though there was one survivor, a priest. He then grew up to be a father, his son then had kids, and a generation of of priests began growing, waiting to once again start a religion. Shachonians VS Gargs The first Shachonians VS Gargs battle is known as a religious battle, and some say it wasn't. It took place after the Shachonians began beliving in a god called Shacho. Still, Shachonians do belive in science. Closing I hope you enjoyed a tour of Shachonian Religion, but will the Shachonians stop beliving in Shacho? We'll never know......................